Love Yourself

You can love yourself and they won’t love you.
You don't love yourself and they will love you.

Or maybe they won't love you because you don't love you, instead you're sending a vibrational signal of desperation. And when a narcissist or a person out of alignment with the Divine within themselves pick up on the vibrational energy of you not loving yourself, they know that they can take full advantage of you. They don't feel remorseful about it, because this is how they have always survived. They don't understand love or Universal law.

Nothing is guaranteed. There is someone who will love you with a broken heart because they see that your heart is beautiful. They will love you for you, not trying to change anything about you. They will see qualities in you that you don’t see in you. They will want to love you. That’s real love. Someone will take your broken heart and mend it, healing it, and showing you real love, not love that is confusing, unavailable to show up, and non-committed.
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When you begin to practice loving yourself, you learn to stop judging yourself, and being hard on yourself. Life is hard enough, give yourself a break. And for once or twice, be proud of yourself, look at how far you've come, look at the BS that you have made it through.
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Love is most powerful as it heals all. Love will keep you alive longer and make your journey lighter. Love is the highest vibrational energy available to us. To manifest love in your heart, you must first give yourself permission to feel and experience love. You have to learn to trust it, and you do so by loving yourself first. When you love yourself first, you're not going to put up with that drama, uncertainty, and mind games. Your energy must be focused on tour intention, leaving no doubt or confusing message to the Universe that you will indeed create it.
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When you practice not loving yourself, you will self-sabotage situations where someone is trying to love you. You won't be able to identify love because of your great wall. Because you have lost all hope in love, you feel like when things are going too good, something is going to go wrong. When we have been scarred, used, bamboozled, we don't ever want to feel that way again, so we build a wall in front of our heart. Then here comes the person that is trying to love you, yet they have to chisel away at your great wall. Imagine how exhausting that is, yet someone who wants to be with you, will do it for you.
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When I was first married, I didn’t practice loving myself or taking care of myself. I was never taught self-care. I almost didn’t believe that my husband loved me. I questioned his love, because I questioned loving myself. I sure didn't treat myself like I was loving myself, putting everyone else ahead of me. And because of a past experience in a relationship when someone said that they loved me and wanted only me while he slept with everyone around me, any woman that he could get his hands on, yet he would not leave me alone. That's a sick person, a narcissist that will probably never get help. I was left to heal from that, and I had my guard up, never committing to anyone until I was in a relationship with my husband. In the beginning, I wasn't fully committed, because I didn't trust love. It didn't make it better that I saw terrible examples of love in other people's relationships. I had to learn to keep my eye on my own paper.
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This toxic relationship put me in a position of mistrusting people in my life and people who were trying to come into my life. This lowered my expectations, not expecting commitment, and real love. But I healed.
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My husband had a difficult time loving me and it was almost like he had to prove his love to me.
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I had to get it together. I had to turn my eyes inside of me. I wanted to be trusting in love and realize that everyone isn't the same. There are people who will love you for you, it just becomes a whole lot easier for them to do, when you love you.
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You can run off a good person who has to prove themselves to you. You are wanting them to post you on social media and let you post them on social media. Hey, I love social media, yet I can tell you from experience that it’s good when people don’t know much of your private life.
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They will try to ruin it if there’s a slight opening. The evil eye is always open. Protect your relationships, protect yourself, and protect your love. There will come a time when you will be able to share your relationships with others and on social media, and you will know when that time comes.
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Truly I wasn’t planning on writing about this. This just fell on my heart while I was sitting in bed thinking about the people in my life that want a good relationship and deserves love, and all the good stuff.
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I literally want to create the right person for them and sit them right in front of them. I know people who are the most loving and devoted people that you will ever meet, and they just want a solid partner to build with. I want the people I love to be happy. I want everyone to be happy, but that's not how life works.
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The value of loving yourself gives you the ability to identify and protect yourself from the people who don’t. You won’t take any old crap that’s being thrown at you. You will recognize the lies, the red flags ahead of time. You will be able to see through a ruse, and most importantly, you will walk away without feeling like a fool.
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Don’t ever be ashamed of being played the fool. There’s even an old school song by The Main Ingredient about this, “Everybody plays the fool, sometimes, no exception to the rule.” If you’ve never heard it, look it up. It’s a beautiful song.
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I know how it feels to be embarrassed when everyone knew but you how someone was playing you for a fool. You shouldn’t be embarrassed, you’re the loyal one. They should be embarrassed for doing what they did, but they don’t, because you have a lot of narcissists out here. I am writing more on narcissists later on. These kinds of people never feel real remorse. Or maybe you didn't know, it doesn't matter, that's still not a reason to be embarrassed about it. Some people are professional liars and they have had years of practice. 
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I am equal opportune lover, I expect what I give, and if the relationship isn’t reciprocating, then I remove myself from it. I won’t beg anyone to love me. I won’t convince them to love me. I won't try to bargain with them to love me. I won’t pretend to be someone other than myself for them to love me. I am going to be me, 24/7 be me.
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And I won’t require someone to change the shell of themselves for me. It just means that they’re not for me, and that’s okay. Because I truly believe the saying, “there’s someone for everybody.” We don’t require the same things. But one thing’s for sure, we all want respect and real love.
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I truly believe that everything is energy and that’s how I look at everything as energy. And I mean everything.
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This Venus retrograde has love on my mind. Venus retrograding forces us to take a hard look at all of our relationships. And it pushes us to eliminate what no longer serves us. Retrogrades are about revisiting, and we revisit the past relationships that need to be worked on or cut completely from our lives.
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It’s the same thing with Mercury retrograde, although Venus is a lot tougher on our relationships. During a Venus retrograde, a few years back, I was involved in a budding friendship that went left quickly. I took responsibility for any energy that I brought to the relationship as I was going through a difficult time. It was the first time that I was having difficulties with my kidney transplant, and my doctor told me that I didn’t have long to live. This sent me spiraling and I had to catch myself. It’s a tall order to be friends with someone dealing with a chronic illness. She never felt like she did anything out of alignment or took responsibility, that's okay, I do what The Most High leads me to do. I always clear my slate.
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I believe that everything happens for a good reason, and I wait as The Most High reveals that reason to me. Some people don’t deserve you in their life, that’s why The Great Spirit removes them. 
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When people are removed from your life, you are being protected by a greater power that can see far beyond the road then you can. There’s a power that is saving you from greater hurt that might shatter you to pieces. And a lot of our hearts can’t take too many more breaks. Some people’s heart is being held together by a thread, and they need healing. They're not healing they are just holding on, restricting. Heart attacks are said to come from the joy being sucked out of you, out of your life. 
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This Mercury retrograde brings back old lovers like you left something. And if you do get back together with them, trying it again, you will find that the relationship will begin to sour around February 3rd when Mercury goes stationary. There will be a post phase of Mercury that lasts for two weeks of Mercury going stationary, February 17th. You may be experiencing relationship issues with someone now, don't give it too much energy and attention, because feelings will change after this retrograde. There is nothing to fear about these retrogrades, they help improve our lives.
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"Man never made any material as resilient as the human spirit." Bernard Williams

You have the spirit to open your heart to love again. It's just when you align with love, love travels to you. Gravity is the Universal force of attracting everything that vibrates together, that vibrates the same. This means when you vibrate on a love frequency, you will literally vibrate love towards you.
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Relationships fail because people fail to see themselves. I am going write on this topic further in the future. I always say, "people don't see themselves." It's so much easier to see the other person and so much harder to turn your eyes inward to see you. This is why we are always pointing the finger outward while not taking responsibility for the part we play. What do you ignore? What do you ignore within you? What do you know about yourself that needs healing, that needs inner work, instead you're ignoring it, you won't take a good look at it? You are surviving this way, and it just jumbles up everything when you're faced with relationships. Because, if you ignore tending to your own needs, nature, and feelings on the inside. You will surely overlook the same things in other people.

Whatever we feel about love will surely show up in our lives. If we feel unlovable, it will be a hard road to love. If we break free from situations that don't define real love, we create space for someone who will love us to come into our lives. If we keep complicated relationships in our lives, non-committing, disloyal, we are telling the Universe that it's exactly what we want, what we are looking for. 

Take care of yourself, so you can take care of your health, then you will always be able to take care of yourself. There is nothing that you can do without your health. Love on you like you love on everyone else. Love you the way you love them, give yourself the love that you give away so freely.

I'll tell you this, people recognize when you love and care for yourself.

And the answer is no. No to anything that doesn't align with your heart's desires, anything that you don't want to do, or don't want for you.

Thank you for reading, I can go on and on, so I am thinking of doing a part 2. Let me know what you think in the comments.

Infinite love you,

Raquel
newdayze.com