THE ULTIMATE EXPERIENCE
Come, sit with me, close your eyes, hold my hand, let's go far away from this place to the place in which you came from.
"You May Not Be Ready For Change..."
It's great to be here writing to you, and I truly mean what I am saying. I have been out of commission for awhile now, so everything feels brand new to me. I suddenly became ill on the 24th of November, and it brought me to an uncomfortable place in my mind and body. I have experienced a major shift in my vibrational frequency, and I know that I can never return to where I was before. Nothing is the same right now and it will never be the same again. I am fine with change, I have experienced a great deal of changes throughout my lifetime. I have been thinking about writing to you every day. I have been thinking about doing my YouTube videos, and I wondered where I would begin. I realized that I must take a page out of my own book, and begin again and again if I have to, beginning at the end. I had to understand that I must be gentle with myself first, I was forced into taking it easy.
I went back and forth for the past few days inside, deciding what I would write about. Like I said I have been shifted inside, so it feels like I am starting with a clean slate. I am adjusting to my new. You may not be ready for change, but change has always been ready for you.
You know how you'll talk about things that you want to change in your life, but nothing changes. What you plan on doing when this happens, or when that happens, and then all of a sudden, you are thrusted into change. You are pushed into a change where you didn't have a choice, but to change. This has happened to me many times before, and I never saw it coming when it did. The thing about change is, it drops subtle warnings that it's coming, then it comes in full force. Like before I became ill, I felt pain in my chest, I ignored it, and continued on, because I didn't think much of it. I had been saying that I was going to go on a fast, and then pick up with a raw fruit fast after 72 hours of water and herb fasting. Yea yea, I talked and talked about doing this, I was putting it off until after the holiday.
I at least ordered all of the herbs that I need for this fast that I was talking about doing. When I went to the kidney doctor, she wanted to run some tests on me, but still she said that she wouldn't know how to treat me if there were some issues there since there are only 3 medicines to treat people who have had kidney transplants with, and I didn't respond well to any of them. I stayed up all night for 3 nights in a row, researching what I would need. I consulted with higher powers to steer me in the right direction. I said to God, "where you lead me, I will follow."
I knew what I was saying could lead me to an uncomfortable place, and still I meant it, and I still do.
When I was stricken with sickness, my mind was in a space between nothingness. Nothing mattered anymore. All that I had promised for myself, what I aspire to be, to do, none of it mattered. None of the conversations that I had previously mattered. Nothing that anyone had done to me mattered. Nothing that I had done, mattered. The pain was so excruciating that I could think of nothing else. I wasn't visualizing anything or affirming anything, I was in a space of blankness. I was there in a space of nothing, not focused on anything, just peace, just wanting to escape this awful pain.
While I was writing this blog to you, the site that I am using changed the page while I was typing. I literally lost everything that I said to you after the last sentence of the last paragraph. I have to admit that it was a bit discouraging, this has happened to me once before, but it was months ago. I shall continue on...
There is a subtle voice inside of us that tells us what we need to do to make our lives better. This voice is a Divine message and we ignore it. This voice brings us to our Divine purpose and we shun it. The message may not be loud in voice, but it is consistent. It consistently shows up as examples in our lives to tell us that it is time to change our direction. It shows itself in ways that upsets us, that pulls us out of alignment with our true nature, and we think that we can get around what we are being told to do. It tells us that it is time to move on and we stick around to see what happens if we don't. We wait until everything happens in full force and then we cry out why?
The signs are always before us. Unfortunate occurrences happen and still we try to get around the change that we know is necessary for our spiritual and physical growth. Change is always waiting on us, as we drag around slowly, thinking that we can avoid what must be done. We forget who's in control. Once change presents itself in full force, we are reminded of who is truly in control. We try to control and manipulate everything to do what we want to do before changing. When God is telling us to change now, before we are forced into change. We say we trust God, we have faith, but we trust what we see before us, even though we know deep down inside that it is subject to change, and to change drastically.
God says move, we say, "okay I need time."
God says change it now, we say, "okay I'm coming."
God says, I said change, and we say, "I will."
We say that we are going to change, but we don't until we are forced to change. We wait until the person that we need to leave alone, abandons us and then we wake up and say that we see this change that we need to make. We wait until the job that we work completely drags us, fires us, takes everything away from us, and then we say, "I can't believe this has happened to me." We continue to let things that have no productive place in our lives, drain us and shape us, before we change.
We consider changing, we think about about, and how it would be if we did change, and then we sit still, making no changes. We stay in that toxic relationship, hoping that we will get something better to come along, or that the relationship will magically change itself, all to avoid making the change that we know we need to make for our sanity. We know that we are not happy in our predicament, yet we still hold off from our own happiness, because we know that happiness will require us to experience great change. We take chances with our health, putting it at the end of the line, until we are stuck in bed unable to move.
The voice that was once subtle and low, has grown loud and forceful, and then it dies out. It has delivered its Divine message to us again and again. We have ignored it, postponed it, and denied it, and now it is here.
This is why when things that seem awful happens in our lives, they are really blessings in disguise. We denied ourselves the necessary changes and now we are faced to live with the no choice changes. We know that we need to change our attitude and how we have been responding to things, the things that we have been participating in, and we put it off. Then God comes and touches our soul, and we are shifted into the position where God has been telling us to go all along.
Something happened to me that pulled the life out of me
I don't know how to get back
something has come for me
There is nowhere for me to return to just wait for the
reverse of the pendulum swing.
When you are pushed into change know that there has been a special calling on your life. You are being called forward to make a move, and the time is now. We must stop underestimating the power of God and truly trust in the change. Once we have learned the lesson, it is time to move on from it, for there is a new lesson that awaits us.
Love is waiting for you, prosperity is waiting on you, great health is waiting for you, that great fulfilling relationship is waiting on you, whatever you are holding in your heart is waiting on you. It's waiting on you to come on. It's always been waiting for you, and you have been putting it off. If God has to knock you off your feet to stand you on your path, it will happen.
You may not be ready for change, but change is always ready for you to come on...
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Infinite love to you!
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Raquel Givens Jones
Dancer, Author, Blogger, Poet, Writer, Radio, Dog Lover, Yogi,
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